Author: Paul R. Brian
Every woman has intuition, but far too many of us don’t trust our own gut.
This is especially true when you have a gut feeling he’s cheating, no proof and a heart full of worries.
Are you imagining things, overreacting or are you right on the mark?
Here’s the thing:
If your intuition says that your partner is cheating on you, it's best to listen to that incessant voice within you, telling you that something is not right.
Follow it where it leads you and see what comes up.
Here’s how to tell if your gut feeling is right or not.
Keep an eye on these signals from your guy.
If you’re seeing a few of them pop up, you have a serious problem.
Having a gut feeling he’s cheating, no proof is an awful situation to be in, and I’ve been there myself.
The first behavior to watch for from your man is if he seems increasingly distracted and distant.
This is the warning sign that comes before all the others I’m going to list here.
Of course, there are times when a man can get overwhelmed with work and hardly notice anything around him.
That's perfectly understandable.
However, in a situation where your man (who used to give you unrestricted attention) begins to distract himself inexplicably, you have a reason to worry.
Here are 15 more surefire signs that your gut feeling is on the mark.
Social circles change, that’s natural.
But if he’s got a whole new circle of friends and hobbies you never knew about, it can be a sign that he’s stepping out.
Not only does it provide him a lot of opportunity to cheat while he’s supposedly out with these new buds, it also gives him a lot of potential access to new playmates.
You may find that your partner has an email account that you’ve never seen, or maybe he has two phones and you only know the number of one of them.
Since when did he get a second Whatsapp account or sign up on Instagram under the fake name Ricardo? How strange…
Another common signal is when he starts walking away from you as soon as he answers calls.
Another classic sign? He gets defensive when you walk by close to his phone.
What’s in his secondary IG account, or that new Facebook account he’s cruising?
You have a reason to be suspicious if he’s creating alternate social media accounts, because apart from advertising his business there’s really no reason for him to do so.
This is a real sign that he is dating someone else, and that his time with you doesn’t mean what you hoped it did.
Has he accused you of having an affair?
Does he often seem suspicious or unsure about what you are doing, especially when you haven't even changed your behavior?
The founder of psychoanalysis Sigmund Freud called this projection. It’s a strategy to take the focus away from yourself and turn it onto someone else.
After all, you can't focus on his mistakes and weird behaviors if you're trying to defend your own actions from his accusations.
Your guy might just be taking a renewed interest in his appearance, but if he’s suddenly dying his hair, carefully styling his facial hair and decked out in new clothes like a supermodel, you have reason to be curious…
So you have a gut feeling he’s cheating, no proof, but you can clearly see that your guy is suddenly super obsessed with his appearance?
Maybe he’s bought snazzy new clothes or expensive perfumes.
Then you start to realize that he looks more in the mirror or has been going to the gym non-stop.
What’s up with that? Probably another woman he’s already seeing or at least hoping to see soon…
If it’s not for your benefit or his, it’s probably for someone else’s.
If he changes his phone password, starts switching up his unlock screen password on the computer and hiding parts of himself from you, it’s not a good sign.
This can also include him stopping communicating and avoiding talking to you as much as possible.
This is another big red light. He’s locking down his life and hiding it from you…
The question is why…
When it comes to a gut feeling he’s cheating no proof, this is a big reason to seriously worry.
When sexual attraction fades away, it’s usually a gradual process.
But if he’s gone from being on fire to being an ice bucket, there’s a good chance another sex partner is involved who you don’t know about.
When he jams on the brakes like he’s the conductor stopping a runaway train and he avoids going down the tunnel anymore (sex metaphor, check) then you know you’re in trouble.
The truth is that he’s probably traveling down some other tunnels behind your back.
If he suddenly gets mad at you because of little things like not changing the toilet paper roll...
That could be a sign that he's cheating on you.
It may sound random, but men who cheat often get very short-tempered for a very simple reason:
Often, the guilt of maintaining an affair causes the individual to get angry with his girlfriend or wife.
He subconsciously hopes that starting a fight will make him feel justified in carrying on the affair.
This is especially true if he has always been very open about sharing your location with you.
Now his location-sharing function only appears periodically or is permanently disabled.
Why would he need to turn off the phone locator app if he always used it before?
Because he doesn't want you to know where he is.
Watch out for lame excuses on this one or overly defensive, angry reactions from him: those are a giant red flag.
If your partner suddenly wants to be alone all the time it’s a flashing red warning light.
Maybe he’s going through depression or a personal crisis, absolutely.
But in some cases he wants to be alone a lot simply because he wants to avoid you and he’s focusing his attention and affection on another lady.
If he starts not caring about what you did during the day and how you're feeling, this is usually an indication that he's finding emotional satisfaction elsewhere.
When he stops kissing you it can also be a related sign that he’s cheating.
These can also both be signs that he’s simply shut down in the relationship and trying to head for the exit.
Either way, it’s bad news.
He may be doing a great job covering his tracks of infidelity, but somewhere in his social circle there will be a flaw.
If you feel that conversations or interactions with his friends are different for no apparent reason, it may be because they already know what you suspect.
Watch out for this subtle sign.
When it comes to a gut feeling he’s cheating no proof, this is one of the strongest sleeper signs that many women miss.
(Why is this important? It is because your core attachment style largely dictates and influences what happens in your relationship. Thus it’s imperative you understand your core attachment style!)
When he’s constantly working late and has awful excuses for it, you’re justified in being suspicious.
Working late at the office is a classic cheater excuse.
So either he’s just gotten a raise and he’s earning it with overtime, or he’s giving his raise to a new bed buddy.
If you realize that the bills have increased radically and in strange ways, it can be a sign that he’s spending money on somebody else.
If you share a credit card or have access to his accounts, watch out for unexplained and random charges, especially at hotels, restaurants or entertainment events.
These are often the telltale signs that he’s dating someone on the side.
If he’s suddenly overly nice, it can be tempting to just sit back and bask in it.
But be aware that this is one of the common reactions of a cheater.
To assuage his guilt, he showers you with even more affection, gifts and kind words.
Be careful, because sometimes all the flattery can make you miss the poisonous snake in the grass (him).
Always trust your gut.
You may be mistaken about your man cheating, but chances are that your gut instinct that something is wrong is probably correct.
Communicate with him and be direct.
If he’s not cheating, he may be glad for the chance to tell you what is going on instead.
Here’s to wishing you the best of success in your relationship!
Paul R. Brian
Paul Rowan Brian is a freelance journalist, author and writer from Canada. He's written for Ideapod, Hack Spirit and Love Connection and is focused on culture, relationships and self-development. You can follow him on Twitter @paulrbrian.
Editor & Author For National Council for Research on Women. Founder & Author of the Popular Women's Relationship & Dating Advice Website, The Feminine Woman.
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