Are you picking up the message he’s saying?
Even the shiest of guys have hints that they send out to let a woman know they’re interested.
Here’s what to watch out for and how to interpret it.
Table of Contents
The first of the undercover ways guys hint they like you is by complimenting your style.
They will say that your new shoes are really stylish, or compliment how you always manage to find the most unique and cool looks.
They may remark on your new hairstyle or tan and say that you’re looking great today.
This can sometimes mean a guy is gay, of course, but you have to pay attention to the context.
If he’s saying it in a kind of shy but genuine way and looks a little embarrassed, then he’s probably attracted to you and using this compliment as an “in” to flirting with you.
He may be talking about your style or your hair, but what he’s really saying is that you’re sizzling.
Although delivered as a generalized compliment, this is almost always a good sign that a guy likes you.
When a guy likes you, he wants to find ways to be a net plus in your life.
One of the best ways for him to do that is to boost your self-esteem.
He may do that by praising projects you’re working on, complimenting your skill at a hobby you love or by remarking on things he appreciates about you.
Other examples of self-esteem boosting behavior from this guy might include:
Praising you in front of a group of peers or friends
Recognizing or highlighting accomplishments you’ve had at work
Introducing you to people who are important for your professional networking
Giving you a thumbs up and encouragement about your workout routine, dieting and health habits
Validating you in other ways such as your taste, your choice of neighborhood of where to live or complimenting how cool your friends are.
In one way or another, he will find a way to show you that he appreciates you and sees your value.
By the way, did you know that there Are 7 Common Signs That A Woman is Perceived as Low Value to All Men. Do You Know What They Are & How to Avoid Them Like the Plague?
(Why is this important? Because men and women perceive value very differently and you don’t want to be making mistakes that would cause quality men to dismiss, abandon or alienate you.)
The best compliment anybody can give you is wanting to spend time with you and share their life with you.
That’s why one of the top undercover ways guys hint they like you is by wanting to do things with you.
Whether that’s going to drop-in volleyball, tagging along while you do an errand or going to a concert or comedy show with you, he’s clearly interested in spending time with you.
Whether or not it’s officially a “date,” this is a clear IOI (indicator of interest) from a man.
Also, the more one on one time he wants to spend with you, the more obvious it is that a guy likes you.
Another of the low-key ways a guy lets you know he’s into you is by sharing in your interests.
If he has any self-respect, he’s not going to fake being into your interests.
But a high-quality man may definitely amplify his interest in a certain activity or subject in order to be close to you.
Say, for example, you love painting.
This guy’s never painted but is open to trying it out and learning how to do a simple landscape.
He expresses interest in it and you offer to paint with him one afternoon.
He’s getting closer to you by sharing in one of your interests that he also finds enticing and promising.
Another of the top ways that men show an interest in you is by befriending your friends.
Of course, your friends may be the greatest people on the planet and he might just genuinely and spontaneously wish to get closer to them.
But it can also be a common low-key way for a guy to demonstrate his interest in you.
He is telegraphing that he’s not only open to getting to know you better, he’s also open to becoming part of your life more broadly and intersecting into your social circles.
He’s showing that he not only appreciates you, he also digs those who are close to you.
Any high value guy would have his own friends too, but it's a total giveaway if he really makes the effort to invest in your friends.
Another of the ways guys hint they like you is by joking flirtatiously.
If they’re a classy guy they aren’t going to take it very X-rated, at least not too quickly.
But they may drop some amusing and flirtatious jokes that include a little bit of innuendo.
They’re testing your reaction while also subconsciously bringing up sexual or dating topics that can test the waters.
They’re also offering you the chance to give them back a bit of their own medicine and make your own naughty jokes if you should so wish…
If you want to return his playfulness with some high value banter, I recommend you get some free examples of banter lines to use in this FREE High Value Banter class by our David.
This is one of the more undercover ways a guy will flirt with you:
He’ll play devil’s advocate.
This essentially means that he’ll tease you by taking the opposite side in arguments or in discussions.
Instead of doing so in a serious way or with strong emotion, however, he will play devil’s advocate flirtatiously.
Say you complain about corporate corruption and how the stock market is rigged. He may quip back with something like:
“Yeah, but did you see the dividends Microsoft was offering last quarter?”
Even though you may feel a bit awkward or confused when he does this, it's ok - it's an opportunity for you to push back flirtatiously with your own arguments!
Just remember to keep it playful.
Next up in the low-key ways guys hint they like you is by aligning their schedule with yours.
If you work together this could include noticing that his lunch break is suddenly matching up with you.
But even if your lives are separate, guys will make it clear they like you and want to spend more time with you.
He will free up time slots that happen to fall in line with your schedule and allow him to spend more time with you and your friends.
It’s a definite shift in the you direction.
Another of the top ways that a guy will show he’s interested in you is by buying small and thoughtful gifts for you.
These will often match up with something you’ve expressed an interest in or talked about needing.
Whether that’s a small item for your kitchen or a mousepad from your favorite TV show, they will be gifts that show that he hears what you say and wants to make you feel good.
He’s definitely hoping to pave the path to Boyfriendville with this kind of behavior…
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(...Even if no man has ever given you any love and all you've encountered so far are pen pals, ghosts, booty calls, and incredible duds!)
A guy who likes you is going to have your back when times get tough.
Even if other friends or colleagues drift away or you’re in any kind of embarrassing or tricky situation, he’s going to still stick around.
The bottom line here is that he cares more about you and being there for you than he does about other people’s opinions of you or him.
Even if you’ve become unpopular or are going through a really hard time, he won’t cut you off.
He truly wants to help and be there for you in whatever you need, an obvious sign that he’s got feelings for you which go beyond the purely platonic.
Next up in the signs a guy is low-key in love with you is that he will intercede and do things on your behalf to help you out.
If you have somebody harassing you at work, for example, he may offer to speak to your boss about it or help you find other employment.
If you’re having a family problem, he may do his best to offer advice or support where he can.
He’s not going to be scared to put himself out there for you, because you’re a valuable person for him and making your life a little easier makes him feel needed and valued himself.
These days a lot goes on on social media and it can make a big difference in our daily lives.
Think about the last time you received various positive messages and supportive likes, versus the last time you got criticized or mean comments and downvotes.
Both experiences likely had a real impact on your mood and how your day went, even if it only sank in later.
That’s why a guy who likes you also often shows it on social media.
He likes your posts, watches your stories and shows an interest in what you post.
The only caveat here is that he may not always be fully paying attention as it’s well known by many guys that this can be perceived as over-eager and over-needy and be unattractive to some women.
A man who cares for you is going to want to advise and help you in any way he can.
If your car is having trouble and he’s a mechanic then he’s going to want to help out.
I’m not saying he’ll be your on-call unpaid assistant, and no guy wants that even if he’s married!
But he will show obvious interest in sharing his competence and know-how with you and making your life’s issues and problems a little easier to solve.
In any way he reasonably can, he’s going to be there for you and trying to help you out.
When a man cares about you he’s going to do his best to actually improve your life.
That includes trying his best to make your dreams come true.
Whether that be in your career, your personal life or any other way, he’s going to use his know-how (see last point) and his connections to be a boost to you and benefit your goals.
Moving you one step closer to achieving what you want makes him feel a warm glow inside.
Whether or not it leads to romance with you, he’s going to do it because he likes you and it’s really as simple as that.
A guy who likes you is also going to show it by helping you out in any small additional ways he can.
In addition to sharing his know-how and competence, he’s going to give you a ride when you need it, help recommend a good doctor to you or be a positive in your life however he can.
No matter how small the favor, he’s going to perk up and hear you out about what you need help with.
He’s not going to be your lapdog or come calling at your every beck and whim. But he will make it clear that when he’s able to help out without throwing out his schedule or going to extreme trouble, he will do so.
If he doesn’t have time, he’ll recommend somebody who does.
And that's a telltale sign he truly cares.
But if you want to find out how much he truly cares, then you definitely need to work out if he intends to (or has the capability to) commit to you long term.
You can find that out with our quick and easy quiz:
Last up in the more counterintuitive and low-key ways guys hint they like you is by sometimes just giving you space.
There are times for all of us when we really just need a moment or two by ourselves, whether that means a few days, a few weeks or maybe even longer.
A guy who truly likes you and respects you is going to pick up on your need for space and give it to you.
He won’t be demanding or expect anything in return, either.
He’s giving you time and space you need and leaving it fully up to you if and when you get back in touch with him.
This is a real type of respect and affection that’s definitely necessary in all friendships and romantic relationships as well.
If you see at least 5 of the above signs, there's a good chance he might like you.
However if you see 7 or more of the signs on this list, that's an obvious sign he's genuinely interested in you.
Whether he confesses to his deeper feelings or not is another matter.
Some guys are so shy or lacking in confidence that they will hide a lot of the signs they like you.
Try to be patient if he is a shy guy, and if you're attuned, you'll really start to pick up the subtle signs he likes you through his body language.
Remember always that actions speak louder than words: a guy may not verbally tell you he loves or likes you, but if his actions make it obvious that he does, then perhaps it's time to give hints that you like him too - but only in a low risk and high value way.
Case study: Learn how Kristin went from being completely burnt out with online dating, sick of getting ghosted and completely exhausted from giving her heart and soul with nothing in return… To having high value men begging for her attention & having the most “electric” date of her entire life. (…All by changing one simple strategy.)
Paul R. Brian
Paul Rowan Brian is a freelance journalist, author and writer from Canada. He's written for Ideapod, Hack Spirit and Love Connection and is focused on culture, relationships and self-development. You can follow him on Twitter @paulrbrian.
Author & Editor For National Council for Research on Women. Founder of the popular women's dating & relationship advice website, The Feminine Woman.
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